For all of the Dads - an email I sent

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!!!!

I first became a father at 19 years of age and I had no clue how to be a father except for the example I had of my dad. My dad was not a warm and fuzzy guy and I do not remember him ever saying, “I love you”. I knew he loved me because he spent almost every free minute doing something with us kids and he did like to stroke our head or play with our toes. He was a hard working man who hardly ever thought of himself. My dad was a product of how he was raised by his dad and I am a product of how I was raised.

I failed so many of the trails, which I will not detail here, that a dad goes through with his children. For the first nine months of my son’s life I was overseas serving in Vietnam.  

I became a father again when I was 30 and then adopted a son when I was 31.

Here is what I do know: All of my failures as a dad are not how things will be in the future. I can change my attitude and I can grow. I am no longer a failure as a dad. Maybe my kids have not been forgotten my failures but I have changed and apologized for those failures. Only our heavenly Father can heal the wounds I caused. I am thankful that He healed my wounds and then moved me to change my attitude and behaviors.

When I accepted Jesus as my savior and began to pray to God I found myself relating to Him as I would my earthly father. I knew God loved me but I did not feel He would express it. For 17 years I lived in a world not expecting the Creator God to express His love for me. Then I discovered God wanted to have a relationship with me. He wanted to talk with me. He wanted to bless me with healing, with gifts and wanted to express His love for me.  

Today I am a product of how my dads raised me.  

No matter what you have experienced or how badly you have messed up as a dad life can get better. I have no intention of telling you how to be a good dad because that looks different for each man. God the Father of mankind wants to show you a better way. All you have to do is go to the Father and ask for help in changing and for forgiveness for your failures. If your dad hurt you ask God for healing of those wounds and dig deep to find forgiveness for his failures.  He moves quickly to forgive and provides the strength and courage to change.  

My experience is God always looks at my potential and not my failures and I believe you can experience that love as well.

Happy Father’s Day, Dad!