Abandoned and Alone

This post was inspired by a men's group I attended last night. We talked about Ruth 3 and as we talked I could identify some of what Ruth must have felt.

Have you ever felt completely alone or experienced the fear of being abandoned?

I have. I know the feelings associated with being afraid of being abandoned and I know how it feels to lay in bed at night or spending your waking hours feeling completely alone. Even when I became a Christian I had moments where I was fearful of being abandoned and a lone.

When I was two and a half my mom left me, my brother and sister and she left us alone. For years after she left I would experience the fear that my dad would leave and never return. When I experienced abandonment at age 24 and again at age 34 these feelings resurfaced. These three events in my life have caused deep wounds within me and with it a fear of being alone and abandoned. 

A year or so ago a friend of mine was off and on in the hospital. Some of the reasons he was in the hospital were the results of his own actions and attitude. On one such visit he suddenly died. He died alone. That day all of the feelings I felt about being alone and abandoned came to the surface. I remember breaking down in tears but I also remember the Holy Spirit gently assuring me that my friend did not die totally alone. On the day my friend died I was healed of my fear of being alone and abandoned.

I am comforted that I do not have to fear being abandoned or alone every time I read Hebrews 13: 5-6 Don't be obsessed with getting more material things. Be relaxed with what you have. Since God assured us, "I'll never let you down, never walk off and leave you," we can boldly quote, God is there, ready to help; I'm fearless no matter what. Who or what can get to me? (The Message)

The first song in my playlist "Stand by Me" reminds me that there are people who are still suffering from the fear of being alone and abandoned. They need someone to stand by them in their struggles. They fear being abandoned because they struggle with alcoholism, drug addiction, pornography and a host of other life controlling habits. The rest of the play list reminds me that God promised never to leave or forsake us.

I encourage you to stand by your friends just as God stands by us. You may just be the person who the Holy Spirit uses to release that person from the bondage of fear.