Let's Get Real

Are you tired of hiding?  Are you desiring to reach victory in overcoming the things that hold you in bondage?  Today is your opportunity to lay before God the one thing that causes you to hide or that one thing you need victory from.

I hope that my story will encourage you to lay it all down before Jesus and accept His grace and mercy.  I am going to share certain events that shaped who I became.

When I was three my mom ran off with another man.  My dad had to care for my brother who was seven years old, me and my sister who was six months old.  My dad owned a construction company and he had to travel each week to the towns where the job sites where.  I remember fearing that one day he would not come home.

When I was in the second grade and again in the fifth grade I had a teacher humiliated me in front of the class.

When I graduated I had a teacher tell me I would never amount to anything but average and that I was not smart enough to go to college.

Soon after graduating from high school my girl friend became pregnant and we were married. Within a month of getting married I joined the United States Navy and went away to boot camp.

When I graduated from boot camp I was given orders to the USS Kitty Hawk which was participating in the Vietnam War.  On the trip to the Kitty Hawk I stopped over at an Air Force base and one of the non-commissioned officers invited me to go to town with him.  That night he sexually molested me.

After thirteen months overseas I returned home to a nine month old child and a wife who proudly admitted that she had repeatedly cheated on me while I was overseas.  Despite letting her be free of commitments to me she divorced me.

These events left wounds deep inside of me that I hide.  I was afraid of being abandoned and I feared having male friendships.  As a result I began to use different things to medicate my wounds and cover my fears.  I tried to escape the pain by using alcohol and pot.  After turning from those for medication I turned to the greatest male medicator, pornography and would spend hours escaping into fantasies.  My fears of abandonment and wounds of life kept me from being anything but average.  I never accomplished anything because I was constantly running away from commitment.

I became religious and still no victory over the things that held me bondage.

Then one day about severn years ago God got my attention while I was attending a men's conference.  The pastor giving the message spoke about our purpose and how God would use our life events to show us our purpose and our mission in life.  I had men who barely knew me pray that God would use me to touch other men.  The next day the pastor asked us this question, "What is that one thing that keep you from being used for the purpose God had for you?"  I tried to hide from answering that question.  As we got into our small group we sat there silent with no one wanting to break the silence.  All of a sudden my hand shot up and I was shocked.  Out my mouth came the words I know what keeps me from achieving my purpose.  I am addicted to pornography.  The men in the group were shocked and I was could not believe I said it.  But an amazing thing happened as one of the men placed his hand on my shoulder and prayed for God to bring victory into my life.  That day was the beginning of a process where God healed wounds and moved me to repentence and change.

For thirty-three years I was fearful and a man who had no true friends. Last night as I sat in our men's group called REAL Men RoCK I realized I was sitting with a group of guys who liked me and who saw me as someone more than average.  I sat there knowing that what I could not do God has done.  I am who I am today because of the events in my life and because of the Grace and Mercy of my savior Jesus that covers all of my fears and sins.  

My question to you is what keeps you from moving forward toward your purpose?  What holds you back from achieving victory?  Do you want to experience freedom?

All you have to do to begin the journey is to lay it all at the feet of Jesus and ask God to send His Holy Spirit to comfort and strengthen you on the journey.  I cannot promise you instant deliverance but I can promise that one day you will confidently say Jesus covers all of my sins.

I encourage you to get real with another guy and let God work thorugh him to help and encourage you.  

Father, Send Your Holy Spirit to that guy who is reading this and needs the assurance that he can achieve victory.  In the power, the authority and the name of Jesus amen