Welcome to REAL Men RoCK

This blog is about the issues men face and things I have experienced.

I hope you will be encouraged, challenged, and stirred to take action.

Proverbs 27:17 (The Message)

17 You use steel to sharpen steel, and one friend sharpens another


ighteous   E ncouraging   A ccountable   L oving 


ely on    C hrist's   K indness

Monday, June 29, 2009

Looking Up and Looking Around

We are told in Ephesians 5: 1-2 We are told to be imitators of God and walk in love , just as Christ did, and be a sacrifice to God.  The question many have is how do we do all of that?

In Luke 6: 12-19 we are given three aspects of what Jesus did on a daily basis and I believe if we do these three things we will find the answer to that question.  Is actually simple as looking Upward, drawing Inward as we reach Outward.

Luke 6: 12 At about that same time he climbed a mountain to pray. He was there all night in prayer before God.

Jesus continually looked UPWARD to His Father.  If we will follow this pattern by spending time each day talking with the Father and listening to what He is saying to us the next two aspects of Jesus ministry will flow in and through our lives.

If you have a difficult time spending 30-60 minutes in prayer at one time I suggest you find many small moments to pray.  

Luke 6: 13-16 He was there all night in prayer before God. The next day he summoned his disciples; from them he selected twelve he designated as apostles: 

  Simon, whom he named Peter, 
  Andrew, his brother, 
  James, son of Alphaeus, 
  Simon, called the Zealot, 
  Judas, son of James, 
  Judas Iscariot, who betrayed him.

Jesus looked INWARD to those close to Him and was concerned about them.  He shared with them in intimate ways and was transparent with them.


Luke 6: 17-19 Coming down off the mountain with them, he stood on a plain surrounded by disciples, and was soon joined by a huge congregation from all over Judea and Jerusalem, even from the seaside towns of Tyre and Sidon. They had come both to hear him and to be cured of their ailments. Those disturbed by evil spirits were healed. Everyone was trying to touch him—so much energy surging from him, so many people healed!

Jesus was listening and looking for opportunities to move OUTWARD to those who were hurting around Him.

Jesus by praying everyday was open to what the Father was doing in the lives of others.
Imagine the powerful ministry each of could have if we were in communication with the Father and seeking to be involved in what He was wanting to do in the lives of the hungry, the thirsty, the naked, the lonely, the imprisoned and the missing.  Imagine how powerful the Church would be if each part of the Body of Christ would imitate Jesus and pray each day for the opportunity to use the Spiritual Gift(s) that the Holy Spirit has given to them.  Imagine the changed lives that would result.  Imagine how healthy the Church would be.  Imagine the fun and adventures you would have.
It is only a prayer and step away from happening.  Each morning that you wake up, you my friend, are in complete control whether this happens or not.  
The above material was inspired by what I read in "Reap the Harvest" by Joel Comiskey.  

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Going through Hell

 So why am I using a song like this on this blog?  Well, this song speaks about life in a way that I cannot make.  I have faced times in my life when it seemed like nothing was going to turn out right and I was hurting.  When I allowed the hell of life to control me I seemed to get stuck there.
This songs tells me to go through those hellish moments without complaining and making a big fuss about what I am going through.  The bigger the fuss and the bigger the complaint the more Satan will hear me and keep the situation hellish.  Let's not stay stuck in the stuff of life but keep moving forward toward what God has in store for us.     
Father, someone today is reading this and they are facing difficult times.  They may have a problem with drinking too much or are addicted to drugs.  They may be facing a divorce or the loss of a loved one.  They might be unemployed and on their last dollar.  They might not know You and that You sent Your Son, Jesus, to be their savior.  They might have heard of Jesus but never experienced His power in their lives.  Father, move your Holy Spirit now in the lives of those reading this and guide them as they go through the hellish things we face here on earth. We pray this in the power, the authority, and the name of Jesus Christ. amen

For all of the Dads - an email I sent


I first became a father at 19 years of age and I had no clue how to be a father except for the example I had of my dad. My dad was not a warm and fuzzy guy and I do not remember him ever saying, “I love you”. I knew he loved me because he spent almost every free minute doing something with us kids and he did like to stroke our head or play with our toes. He was a hard working man who hardly ever thought of himself. My dad was a product of how he was raised by his dad and I am a product of how I was raised.

I failed so many of the trails, which I will not detail here, that a dad goes through with his children. For the first nine months of my son’s life I was overseas serving in Vietnam.  

I became a father again when I was 30 and then adopted a son when I was 31.

Here is what I do know: All of my failures as a dad are not how things will be in the future. I can change my attitude and I can grow. I am no longer a failure as a dad. Maybe my kids have not been forgotten my failures but I have changed and apologized for those failures. Only our heavenly Father can heal the wounds I caused. I am thankful that He healed my wounds and then moved me to change my attitude and behaviors.

When I accepted Jesus as my savior and began to pray to God I found myself relating to Him as I would my earthly father. I knew God loved me but I did not feel He would express it. For 17 years I lived in a world not expecting the Creator God to express His love for me. Then I discovered God wanted to have a relationship with me. He wanted to talk with me. He wanted to bless me with healing, with gifts and wanted to express His love for me.  

Today I am a product of how my dads raised me.  

No matter what you have experienced or how badly you have messed up as a dad life can get better. I have no intention of telling you how to be a good dad because that looks different for each man. God the Father of mankind wants to show you a better way. All you have to do is go to the Father and ask for help in changing and for forgiveness for your failures. If your dad hurt you ask God for healing of those wounds and dig deep to find forgiveness for his failures.  He moves quickly to forgive and provides the strength and courage to change.  
My experience is God always looks at my potential and not my failures and I believe you can experience that love as well.

Happy Father’s Day, Dad!

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Waiting is hard but worth it.

In 2004 I began taking classes through Vineyard Leadership Institute and planning to serve full-time in the ministry.  I at first thought I was being called to do Men's Ministry. Then to planting a church with my best friend, Doug (in white shirt), at the Lake of the Ozarks.  That dream ended in 2008 when Doug died after a short battle with cancer.  Doug and I had started a men's small group and I surrendered all my dreams to God and told Him I would be content ministering to men.  It has been a blast ministering to the men and being ministered to by the men in our group.

Over the past five years God has arranged for a young pastor and me to bump into each other just at the time when one of us needed it.  We have shared our dreams with each other and grown to trust and respect each other.

A few weeks ago this young pastor, Erik, suggested I come to his church, New Life Family Church, and help him grow it.  I have attended Vineyard Church in Overland Park, KS for the last 11 years and have found healing and peace there.  I have become comfortable there.  I wanted to serve there.  With that meeting I sensed God saying, "It is time for you to pour out into the lives of others in the little town of Louisburg what I have poured out into your life at the Vineyard.  To be honest I struggled for several days, no it was weeks, with that calling but now I can see the potential of what God wants to do here in Louisburg.

I share this because I believe some of you reading this post are experiencing something similar. God is calling you to do something uncomfortable, something daring, something only He can accomplish.  I encourage you to pray about it, seek wise counsel and then move on what God is calling you to do.

I am 59 years old and I believe my best days are ahead.  I am living my Dream, as I reach my Potential, while Serving others.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Why and how you give reveals your heart.

Last week I had the opportunity to talk about giving just before the offering at New Life Family Church was collected.  I based my talk on 2 Corinthians 9: 7  Each man should give what he has decided in his heart to give, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.

I spoke of how God looks more at your heart than what you give.  Why are you giving and how are you giving is more important than what you give.

I grew up listening to Paul Harvey and one of his favorite sayings was, "Now for the rest of the story".  Well now I want to share the rest of the story concerning giving.

If we look at verse, 6 Remember this: Whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows generously will also reap generously. and then verse 8 And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that in all things at all times, having all that you need, you will abound in every good work., we find that God indeed does looks at our heart as we give and although He tells us that we should decide what to give instead of feeling forced to give and we should give with a happy heart He also says we will reap according to what we sow.  If we give sparingly we will receive sparingly and if generously we will receive generously.  

So is God telling us we have to give 10%, 12%, 15% in order to be blessed? NO! He is telling us that we are to decide according to how we have been blessed what to give and for us to give it  with a happy heart.

For example: I could write a check for $1,000 and drop it into the offering and it would be pretty much worthless if I gave because I wanted to get something, or if I felt I had to, or if I wanted to make an impression on the Pastor and I did so with a frown on my face.  If I write a check for $100 and did so because I felt God had blessed me and I thankfully placed it in the offering, God would look upon that as more valuable than the $1,000 the person that I mentioned first.

God does not judge your offering by it's size but by your motive and attitude you give it in.  See if Jesus can take a few fish and some loaves of bread and feed 4,000 men with them He can take your $100 and make it do what $1,000 can.

The bottom line is this, "If God has blessed you abundantly shouldn't you give abundantly?" and if at this point in your life you have a small amount of income shouldn't you gladly give something just to express your thankfulness for what you have?

If God walked into your house and asked to see your checkbook and calendar would He see that you spent more on soda pop, junk food and entertainment than you did contributing to the building of His Kingdom?  If He watched you drop your offering into the collection plate would He see you doing so with joy or with regret?

It is your choice what you give and how you give it.  What does your giving reveal about you?

Friday, June 5, 2009

Extroverts and Introverts - How has God made you?

We have all heard that there are two basic types of personalities: Introvert or Extrovert. As I was riding my mountain bike this morning this blog came to me.  Out of those two types flow the four different profiles: Drivers, Inspirational, Supportive, Competent. 

For the purpose of this blog the definitions I will use are these:
Extrovert - Gets inspired by being around people or doing things for people.
Introvert - Gets inspired by being a lone or by being reflective.

There is nothing wrong with being an Introvert or an Extrovert unless you have taken on that personality for the wrong reason.

I will use my life for an example. When I was a child between the ages of three and seven I was an outgoing and spontaneous kid. I was always being the center of attention in a natural and childish way. I was a jokester from the beginning.

When I was seven and in the second grade I had a teacher humiliate me in front of the class. I went from being an extrovert to an introvert to hide from being the center of attention. Now 52 years later I feed off of being around other people see Proverbs 27: 17 As iron sharpens iron,so one man sharpens another.

I believe we operate in a certain personality but at times move into the other. For example I am an Extrovert but I also enjoy the solitude of a bike ride in the country. I am 75% Extrovert and 25% Introvert. When I am an Introvert I hear God speaking to me and when I am an Extrovert I am pouring out into the lives of others what God shared with me. This post is an example of that.

Now do I believe that being 75% Introvert and 25% Extrovert a liability or wrong? NO! These folks bring us the great writings and other material that motivates us to make changes that fit God's plan for our lives.

What we need is for the Extroverts and Introverts to join together under the guidance of the Holy Spirit to represent the Kingdom of God to those who have never experienced it.
As an Extrovert I struggle to sometimes grasp what God is saying in the Bible but when an Introvert can sit with me and share their insight to what God is saying I can then apply it to my life.
Sometimes we become what other people drive us to be instead of being who God made us to be. This is when I think it is wrong to be either an extrovert or introvert.  I encourage you to discover your foundational personality type and then use that to discover your strengths.  Your life is either fueled by being around and doing things for people or by reflecting on God's word and writing stuff that motivates people to take action.  Both are a vital part of increasing God's Kingdom.  
I recommend the following two books for you to read, "Positive Personality Profiles" by Robert A. Rohm and "Personality Plus" by Florance Littauer.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Marbles and Grapes

Last night I attended a leaders meeting at New Life Family Church in Louisburg, KS.  It was a planning meeting for the move to having services at the Louisburg Middle School and one of the leaders used marbles and grapes to demonstrate what can happen when people mix together especially in a new situation.  

The marbles rubbed against each other in a rough, noisy manner but the grapes smashed together with out much noise but they also broke.  The picture we got was how we can be either like marbles or grapes when tense situations arise.  

I saw another picture as well.  If you mix the grapes with the marbles and shake them the grapes will still get broken but they will muffle the roughness and noise of the marbles. That is how followers of Jesus can be with those who are missing His peace in their life.  

Any time followers of Jesus (the grapes) get around people who do not have a relationship with Jesus (the marbles) they are bound to get bruised but because of the grace and mercy of Jesus they respond with love.  The juices of the grapes represents the Holy Spirit coat the marbles and sooths their hardness.

In "Naturally Supernatural" author Gary Best says this: page 31 "Next in Mark's account, Jesus encounters a leprous man, one of the untouchables in ancient Near Eastern society.  Yet Jesus, moved with compassion, touched him and embraced him, restoring him completely.  Further shock waves ran through the whole community - how much better could this get? This continues throughout the Gospel of Mark and all the Gospels: This is what Jesus came to do."

Isaiah 61: 1 The Spirit of God, the Master, is on me because God anointed me.  He sent me to preach good news to the poor, heal the heartbroken, announce freedom to all captives, pardon all prisoners. (Message)

As followers of Jesus we will continue His ministry and touch the broken and free the oppressed. It will be messy and we will get bruised now and then but the Holy Spirit will heal our bruises as He heals their woundedness through our touch.

If you are reading this and you are wounded please leave a comment and if you are one anointed to reach out to the wounded please respond with words of encouragement.  

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Are you a Johnny?

You and I can transform our place of work or our place of worship if, if only we will risk it all to make it a place people want to come back to.

I encourage you to become a Johnny and make a difference.