My 18th year

My senior year in High School was very eventful. For the first time in my efforts at playing football I made the starting line-up. I was one of the smallest guys on our team but I played like I was much bigger. At the end of the football season my team mates choose me as one of the captains of our team.

I would have made the starting team in basketball too except I let my girlfriend talk me out of playing. She did not like the other girls cheering for me. My nickname was Co-Co, short for Clark bar, and she did not like hearing the girls cheering Co-Co or me running up into the cheerleaders area. Not that I always did that on purpose but I have to admit it was quite fun to do.

Later in the spring I did play on our golf team and we went to the state tournament and if I remember right Tom Watson of Kansas City played in that tourney. We did not place but we had lots of fun.

I was still shy but I was one of the most popular guys in our school. It seemed almost everyone knew who Larry Clark or Co-Co was. As a side note I went to my 40th school reunion and was voted the most changed person in our class. No one could put there finger on why I won that award but I believe it is because I was no longer that shy backward person they knew back then.

One spring evening my girlfriend and I were out on a date and we were laying under a tree in the park. As usual we started kissing and kind of getting out of control when I stopped and told her that I wanted to stop being sexually involved. I talked of how she could get pregnant and how that would ruin all of her plans for college and that I would leaving for the Navy soon. She started crying and asked if I still loved her. To make the story short we had sex and that night she got pregnant. That failure on my part to stand firm as a man changed our lives. She did not go to college until years later and I left soon after we got married for the Navy and Vietnam.

The next thing that year that affected my life and who I would become happened on my way to Vietnam. I had to spend one night at an Air Force base in California before I left for the Philippians. An Air Force Sargent offered to show me the town. Once in town he rented a Motel room and told me he needed to shower before we went to a local bar. After showering he sexually molested me.

I would let this one event keep me from having male friends until I broke free from that fear at age 41 and found healing for the wounds caused by it at age 52.

Guys we all have wounds resulting from others taking advantage of us or hurting us. It helps me to talk about my wounds and I encourage you to share yours here. I have the comment section set-up so you can be Anonymous. If I can help in anyway please contact me privately.